About Family, Social and Emotional Issues

Author: Sam Goldstein PhD & Dr. Barbara Ingersoll
Source: Excerpts from an article by Sam Goldstein PhD & Dr. Barbara Ingersoll, C.H.A.D.D.E.R., Fall/Winter, 1992

How Are New Treatments Evaluated?

The road by which a particular treatment is shown to be effective can be long and arduous. The process begins with the formulation of a hypothesis, or idea. This hypothesis is usually based upon an existing body of knowledge (e.g. “Since stimulant medication helps ADHD children, it might also help ADHD adults”).

The second step is the development of a protocol to evaluate the effectiveness of the proposed treatment. The treatment itself, and the way in which it will be implemented must be carefully defined (e.g. “X amount of medication will be provided to Y number of adults with histories of ADHD for Z period of time”).

The researcher must also specify the way in which the effectiveness of the treatment will be evaluated. Care must be taken, for example, to be sure that the effects of the treatment are not due simply to placebo effect. Placebo, which is Latin for “I shall please,” refers to the very well documented fact that people may respond to all sorts of ineffective treatments as long as they believe that the treatment has the power to help them. Placebo effects can be more dramatic that most people realize. In a classic example, a drug known to cause vomiting actually brought relief to people suffering from severe nausea and vomiting when they were told it would help them.

The researcher must also take care that all who participate – researchers and research subjects alike – are “blind” (unaware of) whether they receive the active treatment or the placebo treatment. Otherwise, the expectations of either party could influence the findings.

Appropriate measurement techniques and statistical tests must be built in, so that the entire scientific community can evaluate the findings. Finally, the results must be subjected to the scrutiny of this group. This means that the findings must be published in journals which accept articles for publication only after careful examination by other scientists who have expertise in the particular field.

As if this were not enough, findings are not considered substantive until additional studies have been conducted to reaffirm (or disconfirm) the findings. This process can take years but it allows us to make sound decisions about new treatments.

Alternative Treatments: Another Path

There is also a second path which some practitioners follow, sometimes in an effort to short cut the longer, more accepted process. This path is fraught with many problems. On this path, proposed treatments stem from concepts which are outside of the mainstream of existing knowledge. They may be instituted long before there is any research which supports their effectiveness often after only brief, poorly designed trials involving a small number of people. Measurement techniques and statistical means of evaluation are scanty, at best, and often single case studies are offered as “proof” of the effectiveness of the treatment.

This treatment approach is usually publicized in books or journals which do not require independent review of the material by recognized experts in the field. Often, in fact, the advocate of a particular treatment approach publishes the work. This fact should raise the warning for the consumer parent. Additionally, although parent support groups have an essential role in the treatment of childhood disorder, in the case of a controversial treatment, parent support groups advocate one and only one treatment. These groups then play an important role in publicizing and promoting that treatment. Unfortunately, enthusiasm is not a substitute for careful scientific investigation.

These alternative interventions commonly claim effectiveness for a broad range of problems. When asked for proof to support these claims, however, proponents are unable to produce documentation. Proponents may also claim to have access to knowledge and information not shared by the medical community at large and, when their treatments are criticized, they may explain this as reflecting a conspiracy against them in the scientific community.

How Can A Parent Be A Wise Consumer?

If you are the parent of a child with ADHD and/or learning disabilities, you know how difficult your job can be. Of course, you want to obtain the very best treatment for your child. In a spirit of “How can it hurt to try it?” you might be tempted to throw caution to the wind when you hear about a new treatment that promises to help.

But promises are not enough. You also have the responsibility to invest your family’s resources of time, money and energy wisely. This means that you must become an informed consumer.

In this paper, we have provided general guidelines for evaluating new treatments. Listed below are some additional tips to help you recognize treatments that are questionable.

• Overstatement and exaggerated claims are “red flags”. Be suspicious of any product or treatment that is described as “astonishing,” “miraculous,” or “an amazing breakthrough”. Legitimate health professionals do not use words like these, nor do they boast of their success in treating huge numbers of patients.
• Be suspicious, too, of any treatment that claims to treat a wide variety of ailments. Common sense tells us that the more grandiose the claim, the less likely it is that there is any real merit behind it.
• Do not rely on testimonials from people who say they have been helped by the product or the treatment. Enthusiasm is not substitute for evidence and legitimate health professionals do not solicit testimonials from their patients.
• Be sceptical about claims that a treatment is being suppressed or unfairly attacked by the medical establishment. Legitimate health professionals eagerly welcome new knowledge and better methods of treatment for their patients. They have no reason to suppress or oppose promising new approaches.

Excerpts from an article by Sam Goldstein PhD & Dr. Barbara Ingersoll, C.H.A.D.D.E.R., Fall/Winter, 1992

From an article by Dena Tenenhouse

Over the years, parents, educators, and psychologists have come to realize that children, adolescents, and adults with learning disabilities are struggling not only with the challenges of academic life but also with their everyday social interactions.  To see a child face rejection, isolation, loneliness, and bullying, and to see the pain, frustration, and low self-esteem that can result is quite troubling.   Lack of social competence can have devastating short-term and long-term effects on psychological development and can even lead to other mental health problems, such as depression.

Research into social incompetence and LD shows that these individuals share a number of characteristics:

• They have more difficulty solving social problems.

• They are more likely to choose unacceptable behaviour in social situations.

• They are less likely to adjust to the characteristics of their listeners in conversations.

• They are less able to successfully deal with complex social interactions, such as peer pressure or giving and accepting criticism.

• They are more likely to be the object of negative, non-supportive comments from adults.

• They are less adaptive to new situations.

• They have a lower tolerance for frustration and failure.

There are two schools of thought as to the nature and causes of social incompetence.  The first hypothesis states that social skills deficits are the result of the same neurological dysfunction attributed to academic difficulties.  The second hypothesis states that social disabilities result from the fact that children with ongoing scholastic failure are rejected and isolated and thus denied the opportunity to practice positive social skills.

In my experience working with children with socialization problems, both theories may be true depending on the individual’s particular profile.  Given the supportive opportunity to socialize, some children easily employ the appropriate social skills and build their confidence, while others exhibit social awkwardness and a deficiency in the skills for social competence.  These latter types of individuals require explicit teaching of social concepts and skills as well as a supportive environment in which to practice them.

Depending on the type of LD, the impact on social competence can vary.  For example, a nonverbal learning disability can pose many challenges for social development.  A nonverbal LD involves motoric difficulties, visual-spatial organization (spatial perception and relations) difficulties, and various typical social deficits.  When a child presents as uncoordinated and awkward, activities such as playing sports, climbing a jungle gym at the park, or visually tracking a board game don’t come easily.  These activities may then be avoided or done poorly, thus evoking negative reactions from peers.  When a child experiences poor visual-spatial organization, he may stand too close when engaging in conversation, misread facial expressions and body language, or be overly focussed on details and thus not see the whole picture.  One can imagine the implications these characteristics can have on social interactions.  A child who has trouble recognizing emotions if they are not explicitly verbalized, who doesn’t pick up on subtle social cues, who has a tendency to take comments literally, or who talks incessantly about a specific topic will likely find it extremely difficult to develop positive relationships.

As well as nonverbal learning disabilities, other types of learning disabilities can also lead to social problems.  Language-based and auditory processing LDs can affect the ability to use and understand spoken language and the confidence to participate in conversations.  The challenge of spontaneously contributing to conversations may lead the child to act out, withdraw, or give minimal or ineffective responses such as “I don’t know.”  While trying to retrieve the socially appropriate word, these children may use the wrong term, causing their peers to laugh and think they are weird or stupid.

Those children affected with ADHD also experience a high incidence of social problems.  Their struggle with distractibility, impulsivity, and hyperactivity influence the way they manage interactions, their choice of social skills for a particular situation, and their ability to wait for the right time to implement them.

Playing with peers is supposed to be fun and enhancing to one’s self-esteem, yet for these children it can be a dreaded experience.  With any type of LD or ADHD the child may experience some anxiety around social performing, which will in itself affect how they are able to learn and use social skills.  In addition to the effects of LD and ADHD, there are other factors that can contribute to social competence.  For example, a child’s temperament, that is, the level of emotionality and sociability, will influence his interactions.  As well, social behaviours that are modeled by other family members are of some consequence.

While understanding the reasons for social difficulties is important for parents and others involved with the child, knowing how to help develop social competence becomes the focus.  Yet, critical as it is for many of these children, the challenge of “teaching” social skills can be fairly daunting, sensitive, and awkward.  For parents there is the intense emotional involvement and the tendency to function on “automatic parenting pilot”; for the child there are the feelings of shame and frustration.  Consequently, working on building up the awareness and the behaviour involved in social interactions is no easy task. Nevertheless there are some helpful strategies for improving social competence.

Identify the problem.

Observe your child in a variety of settings and social situations in order to recognize and identify what may be going wrong or what skills are missing.

Ask the teacher, camp counsellor, or others working with your child for feedback on how your son/daughter interacts and try to get specific examples. While this can be painful to hear, keep in mind it can also be helpful information.

Prepare your child for the situation and prepare the situation for your child. Remember not to overprotect and avoid exposing your child to social environments, but evaluate the situations.

Preparing involves several different steps:

Discuss the social situation with them–what kinds of things might happen, who may be there, activities that will occur and how to deal with them.

When possible, visit the place beforehand to get them familiar with the setting and, again if possible, introduce them to the person in charge. Link this new experience to some past positive experience.

Next prepare the situation for the child. A typical concern of parents is whether or not to tell the adult working with the child about the LD/ADHD. My advice is to at least describe the specific difficulties that are relevant to the occasion. You might be surprised at how a reading disability or difficulty following verbal instructions can come up even at a birthday party or a soccer game.

Don’t set your child up for embarrassment or disaster and ruin what otherwise could have been a fun experience. Telling the adult in charge some helpful ideas can avoid pain for your child.  Remember to include some of strengths to keep a balanced appearance.

Remind your child of what’s expected.

Prompt for specific social behaviours just before or in the particular situation. But be discreet keep in mind not to embarrass your child. Using a predetermined signal, that only the two of you know, can be helpful.

Practice with your child.

Practice social skills using role-playing, real life experiences, and scripts. Make it fun and be creative.

Review your child’s social interactions.

Examine what occurred for both successes and errors.

Look at causes and effects between behaviour/messages and the reactions of others.

Explore what both verbal and nonverbal messages meant and what feelings may have been felt.

Ask questions like “What do you think you did? ” or “What do you think you could do?” If they don’t know, tell them the likely outcome.

Help your child understand the subtleties of language.

Decipher more subtle and abstract meanings and idioms of conversation. Using a conversation or a TV show or movie can provide some examples to go over.

Encourage your child to play with others.

Facilitate play dates, but don’t impose another child on yours. Everyone has preferences in regard to whom they want to play with.

For nonverbal LD, provide verbal explanations.

It is important to verbally explain social concepts and give rules and reasons for the social skills.

Explain abstract terms such as “friendly” and “cooperative.”

Teach body language and facial expressions and the meanings they have.

Be empathic when social failures occur.

Instead of criticizing, try saying things like, “I know you didn’t realize that…” or “I know you didn’t want such and such to happen when you… ”

Use these incidents as learning opportunities. Remember that social failures are usually due to a deficit, so be patient, not reprimanding.

Consider professional interventions. A social skills program and/or counselling can be useful in helping promote social competence.

Author: Maggie Mamen, Ph.D., C.Psych.
Source: reprinted with permission

Background information
Children who have problems getting things down on paper often show the following characteristics:

• an obvious discrepancy between their oral skills and their written output; this is usually quite noticeable in Grades 3 and 6 when the demands for written work increase;
• few, if any, difficulties in reading or math in the early grades — except perhaps in the latter when the math becomes written; they often have difficulty lining up the rows and columns and hence make errors when writing that they do not make when they are manipulating the numbers in their heads;
• tend to dislike colouring, drawing, printing readiness activities; parents often confirm this; will not choose such activities during free play time;
• few, if any, problems with large muscle activities (balance, climbing, sports, etc.); in fact, they are often quite skilled in a number of sports; parents often report that they much prefer outdoor activities over indoor pursuits; a small group of children do, however, have both fine and gross motor problems;
• sometimes a mild lag in fine motor development can be measured, particularly in the formation of < and > angles, and sometimes with L and V;
• a tendency to be extremely slow copying from the board, copying letter by letter, even when they can read the words, because they cannot remember what the letters look like; if you make them go fast, they make many errors and become frustrated and often ashamed of their work;
• left-handedness or mixed handedness; left-handers have to overcome consciously the brain’s automatic tendency to move the hand from the midline of the body outwards — which for left-handers sends them from right to left; therefore they have to concentrate especially hard when learning to print and write, particularly when being taught by a right-handed teacher and watching right-handed peers; they may still be consciously forming letters when their classmates are doing so automatically — and this detracts from their ability to concentrate on other aspects of the task (e.g., listening, following directions, understanding what they write, etc.)
• letter/number reversals beyond Grade 1 (especially p/q, b/d, n/u, m/w, 2, z); these are common in the early stages of printing and not something to panic about, but for children who still confuse the formations, it again detracts from what they are supposed to be focussing on and they often get left behind and discouraged;
• some have spelling difficulties –especially with sound/symbol correspondence during phonic exercises or with sight words –in both cases often due to a weak long-term visual memory for letter formations; many teachers report that the child has auditory problems because they do not seem to be using a phonic approach –however, it often turns out to be difficulty remembering what the correct letter looks like and reproducing it from the mind’s eye onto paper;
• orally extremely competent — good ideas, well developed concepts, excellent at show-and-tell-type activities, good general knowledge, fluid verbal expression; NOTE: it is extremely important to distinguish between children who cannot organize their ideas verbally from children with a written expressive difficulty the latter know what they want to say and can tell you orally;
• simplify what they have said orally when they put it on paper– in terms of both quality and quantity; extremely economic in use of vocabulary (will substitute the word “nice” for “beautiful”, for example), even though you know they have a broad lexicon;
• often complete assignments but do not hand them in; hide them in their desk, schoolbag, at home; homework book often gets “lost”;
• broad range of avoidance behaviours around pencil-and-paper activities including a compelling need to sharpen a pencil endlessly, chatting to other children; acting out behaviours resulting in removal from the classroom, defiance, trips to the bathroom, tummy-aches, headaches, frequent absences from school; often referred for “behavioural problems” in Grade 3 or 4 or signs of stress (bedwetting, somatic complaints, sleep disturbances, avoidance of school, etc.);
• often labelled as “lazy” with comments on reports cards like: “… does not complete his work in class”, “… is not working up to potential”, “… could do better with more effort”, and so on;
• marks in content area subjects (e.g., science, environmental studies, social studies, etc.) start to drop in the junior and intermediate grades;
• occasionally have general organizational difficulties — arriving without books, pencils; messy desk/locker; forget to use margins; frequent erasures;
• have difficulty improving their work even when offered attractive incentives or threatened with dire consequences;
• often become depressed and either act out or withdraw — at which point even their stronger subjects suffer;
• parents often report considerable stress over homework; often at least one parent has had similar difficulties and fluctuates between sympathy and frustration; occasionally that parent failed grades and/or dropped out and has high aspirations for the child, especially because they know he is bright.

Strategies for helping children with written expressive difficulties
There are two main purposes in remediating these problems:

• to compensate for the difficulties by utilizing alternative means of output
• to find ways to encourage the child to practise and improve skill levels.

As a general rule, it helps a great deal to think of these youngsters as having a problem with their hands — as if they had broken a wrist and were in a cast. This enables you to conceptualize their difficulties in rather concrete terms and to be creative when it comes to determining compensatory strategies.

Because this is an “invisible” handicap, there is often great resistance to treating these children differently from others in the class if particular consideration is given to these students. Consider whether you would place a cast on everyone if one child’s arm were broken — and have the courage to take the leadership role by telling the other children that it is basically not their place to be concerned and “life is indeed not fair” it is a valuable lesson for them all to learn.

Although there are a large number of suggestions listed below, there is no need to do all of them! Even one is better than none. Willingness to help a child with a written expressive disorder involves an attitude rather than the acquisition of new teaching skills or the investment of a great deal of time.

Compensatory Strategies:

• These children are often extremely sensitive about their difficulties, even if they have been quite obnoxious in their acting out avoidance behaviours. It is therefore extremely important not to point out their problems to the rest of the class, to comment on their work in front of others, or to single them out or put them down in any way.
• It is devastating for these children to have their work marked by other children in the class, especially if they have spelling difficulties, since the others will often delight in “bringing down” a child who appears to be smart. It may indeed be necessary completely to abandon peer-marking if you have one of these children in your class.
• If it is clear that the child understands the general concept being taught, you might consider reducing the quantity of output required on routine drills by having them complete every second question, for example. Setting individual goals by having the child compete against his or her previous performance is a way to motivate without comparing the child to the extremely competent children in the class; for example, asking for “one more than yesterday” or “see if you can beat your best time”. Children prefer timing themselves — if they are able to do so — and like to keep “records”.
• It is necessary to be alert to the fact that many tests that purport to measure such things as reading comprehension actually measure the child’s ability to write and not comprehension at all, and it may be necessary to check out their comprehension orally. It is especially important to see that quiet or introverted children are not overlooked, nor singled out to perform in front of a group when no one else does.
• It is almost always necessary to offer flexible time to children whose writing is slow. However, bright children in particular are sensitive to being constantly last to finish. It is therefore useful to start them ahead of time, or allow them to start or continue a written assignment at times when they have completed other work quickly.
• For children with spelling difficulties, providing a list of “jargon” words in a particular subject area ahead of time can allow them to familiarize themselves prior to the unit being taught. This again prevents the cumulative lag that develops when they are behind.
• Waiting for a child to perfect printing skills prior to starting cursive writing instruction is usually a waste of time. They will never be perfect, and need to learn the cursive formations along with everyone else. Some children, however, have never really been taught to print — they have been expected to pick it up by osmosis — so in the early grades, it is often worth some reteaching, which is best done in small group settings. If they have difficulty learning the cursive script, they may constantly switch to printing. If it is not specifically a cursive writing exercise, it really helps if you can be flexible. They often also have difficulty using pen — it also helps if you can be flexible in allowing the use of pencils. Left-handed children, in particular, often smudge their work when using a pen or a marker, which adds to their difficulties.
• Teaching computer keyboarding skills is usually extremely useful. It should be remembered, however, that fine motor difficulties can make the coordinated movements needed to touch-type quite a problem, and the children need patience and flexibility in learning the keyboard. Allowing them to play games at the computer that require knowledge of where the letters are can often lead to incidental learning and can be fun. However, indiscriminate and unsupervised use of the computer using joystick or a mouse does not accomplish this learning goal or any others, in fact.
• Teaching a child how to dictate on to a tape recorder can be beneficial. They need to be taught step by step — turning the machine on, inserting the tape correctly, familiarity with all the controls (starting, stopping, rewinding, pausing, etc.), getting used to listening to their own voice. Then it is important to teach them how to listen to what they have dictated and gradually to transcribe using the pause button to give them time to write. It is useful to start with a simple spelling list or a dictate, and gradually progress to phrases, sentences and eventually hopefully paragraphs and/or stories.
• There is little more discouraging and depressing to a child with written expressive difficulties than to get back a piece of work covered in red ink, negative comments and corrections. They often glance at it and are too anxious to learn anything from it. The following may help:

1. underlining two or three key words that are mis-spelled and encouraging the child to self-correct;
2. keeping a personal “spelling book” of words that the child commonly misspells so that they can look them up themselves, recognizing that people who cannot spell also often have difficulty using dictionaries;
3. deducting a maximum number of marks for spelling (say, 5%) on any assignment for which spelling is not the main purpose;
4. recognizing that spelling CAN be taught and that most poor spellers can improve, although they will never be perfect;
5. realizing that it is your responsibility to teach spelling, and that these children do NOT learn simply by being exposed;
   understanding that they do not make these errors on purpose and that they are usually extremely upset by them; in fact, many are perfectionists in other aspects of their
6. life and thus suffer high levels of anxiety over their written work;
7. utilizing the resource teacher if available to implement a spelling program, recognizing that there are a number of computer programs that can help;
8. having the child copy two or three key words two or three times, so that the correct form stands some chance of being recognized and remembered;
9. never expecting a child to write out a word more than three times — the exercise completely loses its purpose; instead, encourage them to write it once correctly, cover it up and see if they can write it without looking, and then once more as an insurance.

• NEVER, EVER, under any circumstances, rip up or throw in the garbage any piece of work done by any child. The humiliation and damage to self-esteem that can occur are sometimes irreparable. Many parents report incidents like this that occurred to them thirty or more years before but which still raise the same devastated feelings.
• Please think very carefully before you deprive a child of recess — particularly those whose gross motor skills are good and who have good energy levels. The frustration of struggling with printing or writing hour after hour can cause incredible fatigue and they need a change of scenery, pace and activity. It is important to set a number of small goals that can be accomplished and to reinforce positively the small steps. Children seldom object to recording their own successes in a small notebook dedicated to this purpose — nor does this type of book get “lost” en route to home.
• It is especially important for an intellectually superior or gifted youngster to receive special attention for his or her areas of strength that does NOT involve written work. Allowing oral presentations, construction projects, drama, musical or artistic productions and other alternative means of expression can often open up a shut?-down child and encourage creativity.
• Teaching all children to edit their own work is useful and eventually time-saving. Simply having them read aloud what they have written is a good first step and results in the correction of careless errors. (Sometimes you will be surprised that one or two children cannot read back what they have written only minutes before. This is a whole different ball game!) Going through the work with them and underlining what needs to be corrected, then helping them to correct it (by reteaching if necessary) is the next step. Following this, you can underline and encourage them to correct — and finally the child can be encouraged to find their own errors and correct them independently.
• If a child uses a word processor with a spellcheck program, or has a parent or “study buddy” to whom he dictates, teachers often feel that this is “cheating”, when in fact it can be a useful step in the process of encouraging improvement. If you suspect that the parent or buddy is doing a lot more than simply transcribing what is said, have the child write his rough copy with no regard for editing or spelling — and then hand it in along with the edited copy. If the child cannot type, they often appreciate a story that they have written being typed up for them. Parent volunteers or co-op students will often undertake this task.
• Surprisingly, children who have difficulty with their handwriting often enjoy calligraphy — especially those who are extremely creatively artistic.
• In order to evaluate what a child has learned, consider very carefully whether it is vital for the child to write the information or whether an alternative means of evaluation and assessment could be used. Having the child write what he or she can, and then going over it with them in a warm and friendly atmosphere can sometimes provide important insights into what they have actually learned. Allowing point-form answers or (if possible) multiple-choice formats can help — although if the child has a visual-perceptual problem underlying the written expressive difficulty, they often become confused with computer-ready answer sheets and strict time limits. Just a reminder — what would you do if the most competent child in the class broke an arm the day before an important test or project? How would you ensure that he was fairly evaluated? Use the same ideas for the child with the invisible handicap.
• As with any child who is having difficulties, it is extremely important to liaise with the parents to report positive progress, to set reasonable goals, to have an open agenda about what is or is not expected at home, and to confirm that it is the school system that has the responsibility for teaching the curriculum materials. It is not reasonable to expect parents to teach — some will, but the vast majority do not. Parents are responsible for valuing education in a general sense, being supportive, providing the opportunity for homework to be done, and reinforcing success. It is vitally important that a child who has difficulty completing seatwork NOT be sent home with the entire day’s work. This causes major problems in the majority of families — however nurturing and positive they are — and incredible stress for the child. It is also vitally important that the parents know that this situation exists in the classroom and that something is being done at the school to rectify it. A good rule of thumb is that it takes the same amount of time to make a positive, constructive phone call to a parent as it does to make a negative one, but the payoff is considerably greater.
• There are many tutors and tutoring services in the community that parents will often use. It is important to remember that whatever helps the child is the primary focus — sometimes it is difficult to be gracious about a subtle or not-so-subtle message that you are not doing your job properly, but parents often recognize (accurately) that you do not have the time or opportunity to teach their child one-to-one and prefer to seek support elsewhere. Try not to take it too personally — but it doesn’t hurt to take inventory and see whether you are missing the chance to help even in a small way. Most tutors are extremely eager and willing to liaise with you — if you don’t mind.
• Learning difficulties have been around for a long time and will continue to be. The thrust in education is to integrate all kinds of children into the regular program and thus to raise the anxiety levels of the regular classroom teacher. Do not forget to make use of the important network available to you from fellow staff and administrators; you will find many useful suggestions from your colleagues. There is no magic “fix” — just patience, understanding, perseverance and a flexible approach. A positive and optimistic attitude, along with a willingness to become involved, are the foundation upon which success is built — step by little step.

By Brita Miller

Learning disabilities may present many challenges to the individual other than the obvious. They can have a great impact on relationships and personal interactions. The effects are experienced by persons with learning disabilities and their partners. The problems can manifest themselves in a variety of situations.

A person with learning disabilities may be frustrated about the way a partner provides assistance by feeling stifled when too much is routinely provided, which may give rise to the perception that he or she is stupid or being treated like a child. Also, he or she may feel unfairly blamed for relationship problems, such as not listening or not trying hard enough, which may be due to his/her learning disabilities.

The partner without learning disabilities may experience resentment at having to continually tend to the needs of the other, while many of his/her needs may seem to go unmet.

As everyone has good and bad days, so do individuals with learning disabilities, but theirs are often much more pronounced and frequent. Their capabilities can vary widely from day to day without any predictable patterns or identifiable causes.

Since learning disabilities often are not visible, both partners may have difficulty understanding and accepting the limitations they create. No matter who has the disability, the problems must be worked out together. It is important to distinguish between difficulties which can be overcome (using strategies and accommodations) and those which are not likely to change.

The following are some helpful tips that may be useful for partners who have learning disabilities:

• Have a good understanding of the way in which the learning disabilities affect your ability to process information, communicate, etc.
• Explain to your partner how the learning disabilities interfere with many aspects of everyday life.
• Request accommodations in a direct manner without feeling guilty or giving excuses.
• To maintain credibility with others, avoid “crying wolf.”
• Accept that some tasks may take longer.
• Be as self-reliant as possible by finding alternatives to overburdening your partner

These tips may be useful for the partner of a person who has a learning disability:

• Try to recognize, specifically, how the learning disability impacts your partner’s ability to: pay attention, comprehend, conceptualize, visualize, communicate, be organized, follow conversations, interpret body language, etc.
• Be aware that what appears to be a simple and logical way to carry out a task for you may not be the most logical way for the person with learning disabilities. Persuading the partner to “just do it this way” is not necessarily helpful. Conversely, you should accept that what seems like a roundabout method may, in fact, be the easiest way for your partner to complete the task.
• Remember that the learning disability thought process may manifest itself in a nonlinear fashion, which may seem confusing.
• Refrain from demanding that your partner “try harder” to correct a disability. This would be like expecting a deaf person to hear by trying harder.
• Be aware that “symptoms” of the learning disabilities may be more apparent at the end of the day or when your partner is fatigued.

Socially constructed gender roles may compound the effects of learning disabilities. For instance, men have traditionally been designated as breadwinners. This has not been realistic for some men with learning disabilities who have had difficulties with job stability and career advancement. A couple can reduce the stress they feel by creating more realistic expectations and redefining their roles according to each person’s abilities, rather than tradition.

Although couples may feel that learning disabilities are a unique problem, they are shared by a great number of people. Due to the close interaction of a relationship, the effects of learning disabilities are often greatly magnified, thus creating additional stress for the couple. It is only with hard work and a lot of understanding that these problems may be resolved.

About the Author: Brita Miller is a board member of the Coalition for Adults with Learning Differences (CALD) and the Adult Issues Chair for the Learning Disabilities Association of California (LDA-CA). She is also a member of the California Rehabilitation Advisory Council and a member of the San Diego County Literacy Network.

Reprinted with permission from LD Online (www.ldonline.org)

By Sam Goldstein, Ph.D.

The daily demands and forces that affect adults, though different from those affecting children, are nonetheless significant. From the perspective of learning disabilities we all agree that children with learning disabilities grow up to be adults with learning disabilities. The consequences of their learning disability, however, change. The arena shifts from school to work and community. The implications become more significant. The child with learning disabilities may rely on family and school for support. The adult with learning disabilities, however, often struggles to find a support system. Therefore  adults with learning disabilities may be at increased risk to develop emotional problems and specific psychiatric disorders as a consequence of their learning disability in the adult years.

Professionals need to recognize the logical consequence of increased feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, lower self-esteem and lack of assertive skills that arise as the result of living day in and day out with a handicapping disability, particularly one that for many adults with learning disabilities, was either inadequately identified or not identified,  and was even less likely to have been treated.  I urge my fellow mental health clinicians, counselors and advocates to do the following:

• Recognize and accept that a child with a learning disability grows up to become an adult with a learning disability.
• Listen carefully to what our clients and patients say.
• Obtain careful childhood histories, as those individuals with learning disabilities and psychiatric problems in childhood likely continue to have both problems in adulthood.
• Do not assume that all individuals with histories of learning disabilities will experience emotional problems but recognize that all will be affected to some extent.
• Reasonably assume that most individuals with learning disabilities have had a much more difficult life course emotionally and are more likely to experience feelings of low self‑esteem.
• Adults with learning disabilities can and do experience more life and vocational problems than others. For some, these problems are invasive and intrusive. For others, they are fairly subtle.
• Many individuals with learning disabilities use other strengths to compensate for their disabilities and develop a variety of coping strategies, allowing them to function well in every day life.
• Listen carefully when taking a history. An undiagnosed learning disability may, in some individuals, represent a significant variable to explain the course of reported emotional problems.

With increased community acceptance and recognition that learning disabilities represent a life time phenomenon, medical, mental health and educational professionals are going to find themselves supporting and treating more and more of these individuals. As adult learning disabilities become popular, these individuals are also excellent targets for the marketing of all kinds of fads, mythical treatments, and unproven remedies.

Knowledgeable professionals can offer their patients and clients a powerful sense of hope by being available and providing accurate information, understanding, and support. Although much of the science in adult learning disabilities remains in the future, common sense and clinical judgment can offer great help today.

Reprinted with permission from LDA NEWSBRIEFS, 4156 Library Road, Pittsburgh, PA, 15234

Author: Faye Mishna, Ph.D., M.S.W.

Parents of teenagers with learning disabilities are frequently plagued by the question of how many expectations to place upon their sons and daughters. How much is it reasonable to expect? This can be very confusing, especially since learning disabilities are so often ‘invisible.’ On the one hand, adolescence is an age when teenagers are expected to take on more initiative, responsibility and independence. Typically, this is evident in areas such as school work, hygiene and contact with peers. On the other hand, these parents know that, in spite of their chronological ages, their sons or daughters are not equipped to take the initiative, act responsibility or be independent in a consistent or reliable fashion. Many parents recognize that if their children are left to learn from their ‘mistakes’ or ‘failures,’ what they will likely learn is that they are ‘failures.’ Consequently, parents realize that their children need help in order to have successful experiences and build confidence.

A puzzling factor in all of this is that teenagers with learning disabilities often appear to be, and are, quite capable in some areas. This may lead to the false conclusion that when these teenagers don’t act capably or responsibly, this is primarily due to a lack of motivation. Adding to this predicament are pressures that come from the adolescents themselves and from society. Although they may not have taken on the responsibilities of adolescence, the teenagers don’t hesitate to ask for the rights and privileges of adolescence. This understandably frustrates their parents.

The ‘invisibility’ of learning disabilities may lead other interested and well-intentioned adults (for example, relatives, friends, teachers and other professionals) to caution parents that if they do not insist on their sons or daughters becoming more responsible for their actions, they will be encouraging dependency. The message is clear: if the parents continue to ‘do’ for their teenage children, they will not be helping them develop into well-functioning adults. It is important to place this dilemma in the context of our society in which independence and autonomy are considered signs of good health. Recently, some groups have criticized this basic belief because it is not found in all cultures and societies. But, if a teenager is not able to assume independence and all that goes with it in our society’s expected way and time frame, the child and his/her parents may face significant negative judgements.

All of this may serve to deflate and shake the confidence of parents. They may feel frustrated, inadequate and guilty when they provide assistance to their teenage sons and daughters; angry at their sons or daughters for not being more independent or autonomous; and confused when they can’t sort out this issue. An additional pressure relates to parents’ natural desire to decrease their parental responsibilities as their children grow up. This is a developmental stage for parents that typically coincides with the adolescent stage.

Due to the nature of learning disabilities and individual differences, these teenagers often need considerable support to accomplish certain tasks and to reach developmental milestones. Their parents can, with good will, feel free to lend a hand. This must be coupled with encouragement and expectations which will contribute to the teenager assuming greater responsibility. This is a difficult, delicate and worthwhile balance to determine.

by Marteen

As kids we are taught how to read, write, and speak properly among other skills.  What happens when you are isolated from your friends because your have an attitude. What happens when you try really hard to understand math, but you just don’t “get it”.   What happens when you are shipped off  to different schools each year for the first five years of your life.  Experiences such as these can make people not trust, be resentful toward society, feel like the deck is always against them.

I can remember my parents being called in to school to discuss my behaviors, of not being able to get along with people, always fighting, always drawing unfriendly attention to myself, yet hurting inside.

As the years go on we see people at parties and see how they are smiling, communicating softly and clearly, nodding and listening to one another.

Life makes people who they are, the last minute “Joe’s” who leave things to the last hour because they know they will always get things done quickly and correctly.

The social butterflies who always walk around with a smile on their face, and appear to know something about everything and can smile when it rains, or snows.

Meetings are a place where people share information, someone takes the lead and of course they want support for their ideas, but what happens if all the meetings you have ever attended have always been to defend yourself.

Scars of the past are not easy to forget; we build gates around us or prefer to be left alone.  We think that if no one gets too close to us they can not hurt us.  This type of attitude is self destructive and they only people who we hurt are ourselves.

People who are successful have lots of friends, everyone loves a winner, a person who does the right thing, says the correct thing, and who is always open to new ideas.  How does this happen?  These people do not take things to heart, learn from their mistakes and understand the value of communication.

Information is the key to learning from other people, talk about common interests,  the weather or even the price of gas can break the ice.  Accept an act of kindness when someone offers to buy you a cup of coffee, it helps to build relationships.  Try to walk around with a smile on your face.  Making yourself smile a few times a day can help to cultivate your personality.  Just as a failure can bring back memories of many past failures an act of kindness can light up your soul.

In life everyone fails.  Bad investments, divorce, loss of a job, car accidents, and the list goes on, but we must learn from these setbacks and push on.  Moving forward can mean trying something new, reflecting on what happened or refinding your skills.  Self awareness, trying new things and surrounding your self with positive people are all beneficial.

They say that smile and people smile with you, cry and you cry alone, it is the responsibilities of adults with LD’s to remove the wall that is self made.  Our actions of today make us who we will be tomorrow.  So let’s get involved in our community whether it is by teaching kids how to hold a baseball bat or kick a soccer ball.  The satisfaction a person received from helping someone else will teach us that we all have something to give.

Sharing is how we grow.

Author: Reprinted from: “Learning To Read/Reading To Learn” information kit developed by The National Center to Improve the Tools of Educators, University of Oregon
Source: Reprinted from: “Learning To Read/Reading To Learn” information kit developed by The National Center to Improve the Tools of Educators, University of Oregon

Create Appreciation of the Written Word
Long before children are able to engage in reading themselves, they must feel that reading is something they would like to do. They must develop an appreciation of the pleasures of written language and of the many ways language is useful.

Develop Awareness of Printed Language
Children need to develop a basic sense of what print looks like and how it works. They must learn how to handle a book, which way to turn the pages, and that the printed words – not the pictures – tells the story when you read. Children should be taught that words are all around them – in newspapers, mail, billboards, signs, and labels – and have many different and valuable purposes.

Learn the Alphabet
Comfortable and early familiarity with letters is critical for learning to read. Children should learn the names of letters and to recognize and form their corresponding shapes.

Understand the Relation of Letters and Words
Children need to learn that printed words are made up of ordered strings of letters, read left to right. They should be helped to understand that when the combination or order of letters is changed, the word that is spelled also changes.

Understand That Language is Made of Words, Syllables, and Phonemes
The ability to think about words as a sequence of phonemes is essential to learning how to read an alphabetic language. Children should become aware of the building blocks of spoken language. They need to understand that sentences are made up of strings of separate words. They should become comfortable in hearing and creating rhymes. They should be led to play with the sounds of language until they can pull words apart into syllables, and pull syllables into individual phonemes.*

*A phoneme is the smallest functional unit of speech. The word “cat” contains three phonemes: the /k/, /a/, and /t/ sounds. Letters often represent more than one phoneme – the a in “cat” is a different sound thant the a in “cake” – and sometimes a single letter will contain more than one phoneme. For example, the word “ox” has two letters but three phonemes: /o/, /k/, and /s/. Fluent readers learn to recognize these discrete sounds of spoken words quickly, accurately, and automatically. Phonemic awareness is the foundation on which all other reading skills are built.

Learn Letter Sounds
Given a comfortable familiarity with letters and an awareness of the sounds of phonemes, children are ready to learn about letter-sound correspondence. The most important goal at this first stage is to help children understand that the logic of the alphabetic writing system is built on these correspondences.

Sound Out New Words
As children learn specific letter-sound correspondences, they should be challenged to use this knowledge to sound out new words in reading and writing. Making a habit of sounding out unfamiliar words contributes strongly to reading growth, not just for beginners, but for all readers. Children need to understand that sounding out new words can actually be a strategy for helping them unlock pronunciations of words they have never seen before, and can make what they are reading understandable.

Identify Words in Print Accurately and Easily
The ability to read with fluency and comprehension depends on recognizing most words almost instantly and effortlessly. Once the framework for a new word or spelling has been laid, through sounding and blending, the key to recognizing it quickly and easily is practice. The most useful practice is reading and rereading of meaningful text made up of words the child has been taught to sound out. For beginners, such reading helps most if it is relatively easy. As a rule of thumb, no more than one in 20 words should cause trouble.

Know Spelling Patterns
As children become reasonably capable of sounding out words in reading and spelling, it is important that they notice the similarities in their spellings. Awareness of spelling patterns that recur across words hastens progress in reading and writing, and weak knowledge of spelling is an impediment to mature readers.

Learn to Read Reflectively
Although the ability to sound out words is essential for learning to read, it is not enough. Written language is not just speech written down. Instead, text brings new vocabulary, new language patterns, new thoughts, and new modes of thinking. To enjoy and profit from reading, children must also learn to take the time to reflect on these aspects of text.

Author’s note: The quotations by adults with learning disabilities have appeared in two previous books.

Gerber, P.J. & Reiff, H.B. (1991). Speaking for themselves: Ethnographic interviews with adults with learning disabilities. Ann Arbor, MI: University of Michigan Press.

Gerber, P.J. & Reiff, H.B. (Eds.) (1994). Adults with learning disabilities: Persisting problems and evolving issues. Austin, TX: PRO‑ED.

About the Author: Henry B. Reiff is the Coordinator of the Graduate Program in Special Education, Director of the Academic Skills Center and 504 Services, and Assistant Dean of Academic Affairs at Western Maryland College.

Adapted from an article in Linkages Vol. 2, No. 2, National Adult Literacy and Learning Disabilities Center. Reprinted with permission from the Author

Author: Dr. Paulene Kamps
Source: The Source For Developmental Coordination Disorder

Has your child ever been referred to as “physically awkward,” “sloppy”, or “clumsy”? Have you ever described your own son or daughter this way, or pushed the thought out of your mind as Janey or Matt tipped over another glass of milk or tripped over the ball on the soccer field? Were you hoping they’d “grow out of it”?Such observations could be early warning signals of a treatable problem.

If your son or daughter is of average to above average intelligence and has no apparent physical or neurological conditions, yet experiences difficulties with motor skills, he or she may have Developmental Coordination Disorder (DCD). This is a condition recognized by the American Psychiatric Association as well as the World Health Organization (although the WHO has a slightly different name for this disorder).

DCD can affect a range of normal childhood activities from printing or writing neatly to throwing a ball, from pouring liquids to keeping time in the school band, and it can even curb the ability of kids to participate in games, sports, and other recreational activities.

While the disorder is well-known internationally and has been researched extensively since the mid 1990’s, it is seldom diagnosed in North America. Some individuals refer to DCD as a ‘motor’ learning disability and its presence means that children cannot simply watch, listen to and comprehend instructions, and learn motor skills the same way as their peers. However, researchers now know that with appropriate intervention children with DCD can acquire many of the same skills as their non-affected peers.

How can you tell if your child has DCD? Your child might not have difficulty performing all motor skills. For example, over time children with DCD may be able to swim and use scissors, but they might still struggle with tying their shoe laces, riding a bike, using a knife and fork properly, running with a smooth gait, and/or hitting a baseball. They may have difficulty only with large muscle activities (gross motor skills) or only with fine motor skills (requiring the use of hands and fingers), or they may have trouble with both.

Research indicates that approximately 6-9% of the population is affected by DCD. Without diagnosis and intervention these children may become socially ostracized or choose to isolate themselves. But don’t worry, there are specific ways to diagnose and treat both children and teens with DCD, and importantly, intervention can have beneficial results. Doctors, psychiatrists, and chartered psychologists (especially who have background knowledge about DCD and it’s impact on other domains of behaviour) can determine differences between various types of conditions. And, after diagnosis, specific “meta-cognitive” therapies – going beyond normal learning processes – can be designed to teach children and teens with DCD new ways of learning motor skills.

There is hope for your child on the baseball diamond.

Dr. Paulene Kamps is a kinesiologist and registered psychologist who has extensive experience with children with learning difficulties including DCD. She welcomes your questions at (403) 217-5749 or by e-mail: drkamps@telusplanet.net.

In addition, she has written a ‘Source’ book for LinguiSystems on this topic. It is called The Source for Developmental Coordination Disorder. It can be viewed and then ordered through this web link.

Inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity are key features of Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), a life-long neurodevelopmental disorder most often diagnosed in childhood. In addition to experiencing difficulties in school, work, and social areas, one-third of kids with ADHD also meet the criteria for a diagnosable learning disorder. These challenges have widespread effects and often require complex interventions and support.

Very few people are more familiar with the widespread effects of ADHD than parents of children with this disorder. If this is you, then you know that while parenting is both a challenging and infinitely rewarding experience, it can also be very stressful! In fact, recent studies have found that parents of kids with ADHD experience higher levels of stress than parents of kids without ADHD. You are not alone and your experience of chronic/high stress is real and validated by scientific research.

So what can you do about this stress? Here are some stress management tips from the ADHD & Development Lab at the University of Ottawa, specifically geared towards parents of kids with ADHD:

• Take care of your own physical and mental health: High levels of stress and being stressed out on a continuous basis can have a negative impact on your physical and mental health. Stress-related health issues include an increased risk of cardiovascular disease and a higher risk of developing mental health issues, such as depression and anxiety. Since you may be experiencing higher levels of stress, you may be more vulnerable to these outcomes. Taking steps to monitor your own health and addressing any concerns is important for increasing your own personal health and well-being, which will also have positive effects for your child.
• Seek support: Research suggests that parents of kids with ADHD struggle with a lack of social supports. Coping with high levels of stress and dealing with your child’s ongoing behavioural difficulties can be a very overwhelming experience and the time and effort it takes may impact your relationships. Talking about what your experiencing and seeking support from people in your life may help you to manage your stress. Friends, family, professionals, and community resources can all be sources of support.
• Engage in relaxing activities: Try to make time for relaxing and enjoyable activities on a regular basis. Doing so regularly may help you manage your stress and consequently have a positive impact on your relationship with your child.
• Recognize and validate your efforts: As a parent of a child with ADHD, you may have been blamed or criticized for your child’s behaviour. It is important to recognize and validate all your efforts and the great things you have been doing and remember that ADHD is not caused by “bad parenting” and is not your fault. This is firmly backed up by scientific evidence and research. Additionally, having positive beliefs about yourself and your abilities may have a positive effect on your mental health, which may in turn reduce your stress.

Katherine Dueck ADHD & Development Lab
University of Ottawa
613-562-5800, ext. 4457
adhd.lab@uottawa.ca
www.socialsciences.uottawa.ca/tdah-adhd/

For further information or to participate in a study at the ADHD & Development Lab, directed by Dr. Maria Rogers at the University of Ottawa, please visit: http://socialsciences.uottawa.ca/tdah-adhd/